There Is No Last Straw

bad luck
Foto © zaxl4

A filling falls out. There“™s a mix-up at the laundromat. The car is making a weird noise. It“™s tax time again. The gas valve on the boiler is leaking. The city is cutting down your trees. You can“™t find a flashlight to go look at the boiler. Trains are running twenty minutes late. The bicycle has a flat. The door lock is sticking from the cold. Why is my left eye twitching?

The beer is flat, the waiter is ignoring you, your shoelace has broken, and you stupidly forgot to send in your monthly credit card payment. Your APR has just doubled. Your hair is thinning, you don“™t have a best friend, you“™re barely competent at your work, and the crappy health insurance you have doesn“™t pay for things like lost fillings and twitching eyes. That was the last roll of toilet paper.

What are the chances? One. The probability is one because they“™re all happening, and at once. The car is falling apart, the house is falling apart, your mouth is falling apart… and after they“™re fixed, they fall apart again. The DVD player has stopped, the television picture looks red, and every appliance you touch has dead batteries or a short in the wire. The help line is busy, the computers are down, and somehow you“™re on the government watch list of terror suspects. The one that“™s impossible to get off of.

Your family has become the hostages that keep you honest. Your job, daily penance for unknown crimes. Your time, never yours. The phone sounds tinny, you forgot your login, and now they“™re tearing up the street at 6:00 AM. The railing on the porch falls off.

You fix it, you make it worse. You pay to have it fixed, you get ripped off. Are you being culled? There“™s an icy spot on the sidewalk somewhere, and now you“™re hoping to find it. There“™s a pebble in your shoe.

OK, you can finally go ahead and touch it.
Oh fuck, here we go again…

8 Kommentare

  1. 01

    Oh yeah, GTA makes you forget all these things…
    Look at the bright side: Summer is coming.
    Then all will be better.

  2. 02

    Lo siento Carlito. But what is APR?

  3. 03

    Annual percentage rate => effektiver Jahreszins

  4. 04

    mein English is to bad als dass ich hier einen Sinnfreien Kommentar abgeben kann. Oder vielleicht gerade desswegen?

    Schöne Eastern

  5. 05

    It’s not English anyway, it’s American ;-)

    But then again I doubt he’d use a torch to look at his boiler. And walking on the pavement might reduce his life expectancy quite significantly, even without the icy patch…

  6. 06

    It“™s not English anyway, it“™s American ;-)

    But then again I doubt he“™d use a torch to look at his boiler. And walking on the pavement might reduce his life expectancy quite significantly, even without the icy patch“¦

    Davon bin auch ich überzeugt.

    Schöne Ostern

  7. 07

    Hey buddy, I miss you! We should get together and swap stories of the trials and tribulations of home ownership.